Sadness everywhere

29 Jun

Oh my goodness!  I just finished watching one of the most depressing movies I have ever seen – Blue Valentine.  I’m not really sure what I was expecting; the only thing I remember from previews was that it was going to be about an everyday couple with a child dealing with their everyday problems and heartbreaks.  Well, I guess it was too real and too monotonous for me.  The characters were very relatable and they felt more like people I know with hints of my life mixed in as well.

As I began watching, I kept comparing the movie in my mind to The Story of Us, only the majority of that story followed the older and longer married couple of Michelle Pfeiffer and Bruce Willis.  The problems were very similar between the stories – fighting too often, busy schedules, no time for one another and just anything you can imagine that over time drives a larger and larger wedge between a once loving pair.  With flashbacks in each movie to happier and simpler times, the viewer is left to hope that each marriage will find it’s way back on course eventually.

However, only one of the movies ended with that glimpse of a reconciliation.  The Story of Us ended with an almost desperate plea to make things work and a resolve that the tough road ahead would be worth it.  Blue Valentine basically just ended full circle with the last flashback going to Michelle Williams and Ryan Gosling’s wedding and then leading up to their decision to end the fight for good by throwing in the towel.  Of course neither plot was going to divulge what happens after either choice – do the characters live happily ever after in the first?  And, do the characters in the second struggle on their own but eventually go on to find the right person for them and live a better life than they imagined?

The viewer is left to wonder because how can anyone know what will happen?  Relationships are so fragile and feelings are so fickle.  I think it was best said in Blue Valentine, “How do you trust your feelings when they can just disappear like that?”  These words and movies like these makes one wonder what is happening to our society.  Because, the norm today seems to be portrayals like Blue Valentine instead of The Story of Us.  Also, there are so many stories told about casual sex like No Strings Attached and the new one coming out that looks suspiciously similar; Friends With Benefits.  And, when the divorce rate in our country is around 50%, how is anyone to believe wholeheartedly in the sanctity of marriage anymore?  Even our public figures in entertainment, sports and politics are not faithful or lasting in their partnerships these days.  I, myself, come from a “broken home” (as of about 11 years ago) and a majority of the members of both sides of my family have gone through divorces in their lives.

I’m not completely sure where I am going with all of this except for the fact that the whole picture is failure.  Our culture is putting out the image that it may be better to either start over and reinvent oneself with a completely new life when the going gets tough or just to never become fully attached at all by “keeping it simple and casual.”  It makes me fear for years into the future and what Lil Guy may eventually think about relationships and marriage.  Crazy, huh?!

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2 Responses to “Sadness everywhere”

  1. trininista July 7, 2011 at 10:11 pm #

    I totally understand what you mean. Marriage now seems like something easily dispensed of, if we are to go with what is out there in the media and a lot of people just don’t want to work at it or fight for it. My parents made it 34 years this year – and it was not always easy. I can only hope that whomever I make my husband will be willing to work with me and fight to keep it going.

    Thank you for visiting me on my SITS Day! 🙂

    • stickynotequeen July 8, 2011 at 5:16 pm #

      Congrats to your parents on going 34 years of marriage now! That’s definitely a feat these days! And, good luck to you finding Mr. Right and making it work.

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